i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize