Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
