Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Send help, water and tortillas.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
