What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
