All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
lying in bed pretending to be a slug