I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
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You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
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I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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