they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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