If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
