she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
