first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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