If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
handjob tips. give me some.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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