you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It's never too late to be topless.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize