they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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