party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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