I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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