I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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