We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
