And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
