i already hear my dad disowning me
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
