when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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