i already hear my dad disowning me
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
