i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
