Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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