We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize