your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
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