Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize