CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
