if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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