You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
