I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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