just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Even my vagina gasped.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
