i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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