that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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