i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
no more duck duck goose at the bar
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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