Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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