Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize