Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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