you guys were way drunker than both of me
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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