i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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