not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
