I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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