.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
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