I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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