We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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