yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
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Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
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I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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