all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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