My friends, they love my intelligence
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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