My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
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