Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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