I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
He felt like a one man threesome
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
