am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
