she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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